By Justine Sterling
Updated January 22, 2016
Credit: © Cold Brewed Experts, LLC

The Internet is a black hole for strange, weird and wonderful things—especially when it comes to food. Rather than dive in yourself, let FWx do it for you. Here, five of the most absurd food items we saw this week.

Guinea Pig Haggis: Interested in trying haggis but squeamish about eating all those sheep innards? What about one made with your least favorite, constantly squeaking childhood pet? Good news! A Scottish chef has come up with a sheep-free haggis made with guinea pig. While traveling through South America, chef Paul Wedgwood was inspired to use the popular Peruvian meat in the classic Scottish dish. This isn’t the first time Wedgwood has experimented with alternative haggis. He’s also made Scotland’s national dish with squirrel. [Metro]

Coffee + Juice = Joffee: You know how you drink a cup of coffee and a glass of juice separately every morning? And you know how, inevitably, those things combine in your belly? Well, why not just cut out the middleman and drink them together! You can, thanks to Coffee Juice, a blend of cold-brewed coffee and blueberry juice. [Eater]

Love-Scented Strawberries: When we think of what “first love” might smell like, we think of Axe body spray, stale basements, Capri Suns. Frankly, it’s not an appetizing sense memory. Apparently, first love smells a lot different in Japan. A special breed of Japanese white strawberries called Hatsukoi no Kaori (which translates to “the scent of first love”) reportedly smell like pineapple. At about $6 per berry, the strikingly pale fruit doesn’t come cheap. [Rocket News 24]

Giant Fried Nutella Ice Cream Balls: A Sydney café chain is offering a new, delicious way to commit suicide. Piccolo Me’s massive, deep-fried ball of Nutella ice cream is served with crushed candies and warm salted caramel sauce. It’s supposed to serve a minimum of four people, but obviously Australia doesn’t know what we Americans are capable of. [BuzzFeed]