Credit: © Anatoliy Omelchenko, Inventor and designer of an Edible Spoon Maker

The Internet is a black hole for strange, weird and wonderful things—especially when it comes to food. Rather than dive in yourself, let FWx do it for you. Here, five of the most absurd food items we saw this week.

Japan’s Mashed Potato Big Mac: Somewhere out there, someone was paid to come up with McDonald’s Japan’s newest offering—essentially a Big Mac-esque burger with one patty swapped out for mashed potatoes called the “Name Wanted” burger. Good job, that guy (or girl—girl’s can have silly ideas for burgers, too). You really put a lot of work into this one. The sandwich includes a beef patty, cheese, grilled onion sauce, mashed potatoes, bacon and McDonald’s signature third bun slice. [Brand Eating]

Carrot Cake Kisses: Finally, someone is challenging the Cadbury Creme Egg for Easter candy supremacy. Hershey recently introduced Carrot Cake Kisses: orange-dyed, white chocolate flavored with a hint of sweet carrot. If people aren’t dipping them in cream cheese frosting, they’re eating them wrong. [Mental Floss]

Green Tea Kahlúa: Here’s the perfect gift for the Big Lebowski-loving Japanophile in your life. Suntory Spirits is releasing a green matcha-flavored Kahlúa this March. Celebrate with a batch of Sea Sick Putins (a.k.a. Green Russians). [Rocket News 24]

£500 Gold Pizza: Yes, Pizza Hut may have offered gold-covered Garlic Knots Pizza on Super Bowl Sunday, but those glitzy pies were nothing compared to Pizza GoGo’s new luxe pie. For £500 a pop you get a pizza topped with 23-carat gold leaf, fantail prawns, lobster and beluga caviar, delivered to you by your own personal butler. Want it with stuffed crust? That’s £2 extra. [The Drinks Business]

Edible Spoon Maker: For those who hate dishes but love extra cooking, there’s the Edible Spoon Maker—essentially a portable griddle with spoon-shaped indentations. Sadly, the machine is not currently for sale so the oppressive rule of the non-edible spoon will continue. [Gizmodo]