By Justine Sterling
Updated September 12, 2014
Courtesy of Alfred Coffee

The Internet is a black hole for strange, weird and wonderful things—especially when it comes to food. Rather than dive in yourself, let FWx do it for you. Here, five of the most absurd food items we saw this week.

Death Metal Cheeseburger: Burger King Japan is going goth. The chain is doubling down on their black bun burger by adding black cheese. Colored with bamboo charcoal, the pitch-black cheese is perfect for death metal enthusiasts who want to eat burgers as dark as their souls. [Kotaku]

Realistic Grub Gummies: In the future, we’re all going to eat bugs. If you’re squeamish about the idea, ease into it by snacking on one of this Japanese coffee shop’s extremely realistic gummy bugs. They’re hand-made, filled with sweet, fruity goo and look disturbingly like something you would rather step on than eat. [Rocket News 24]

Baseball, the Wine: You have your favorite MLB team’s insignia on your hat, your jersey, your car seat covers—you even have it on your bedspread. Now, you can show how much you love your team by buying their wine. Major League Baseball has developed a team-branded collection of wines. Currently, there are seven teams represented: the Giants, Yankees, Mariners, Red Sox, Rangers, Phillies and Cubs. In the future, all MLB teams will have a wine. [Fast Co]

Ice Cream Cone Coffee Cups: An L.A. coffee shop is offering chocolate-dipped ice cream cone bottoms as an alternative to cups. It’s either the best idea ever or a recipe for a very hot, stained and wet shirt when the coffee soaks through the wafer cone. [Eater]

Chocolate Teapot: We’re sensing a trend here. What’s the perfect accessory for a set of chocolate-dipped ice cream cone coffee cups? A 100% chocolate teapot. Created by tea-loving British scientists and chocolatiers, the dark chocolate teapot can withstand boiling, steeping tea for up to two minutes—as long as it is not stirred. And if it is stirred? Then may God have mercy on your tablecloth. [Telegraph]