T.J. Miller's Yelp Reviews Are Hilariously Helpful
Stars—They're just like us! They eat in the shower! (That's kinda like you, maybe!) They work in cheese shops! (Okay, you may not specifically do that, but it seems very down-to-earth!) And they write long, purposefully overzealous reviews on Yelp! (Yeah, you definitely do that.)
Yesterday, the New York Post outed actor/comedian T.J. Miller as a serial Yelp reviewer. Actually, "outed' is probably the wrong word being that, as recently as July 10, Miller tweeted to his nearly 400,000 Twitter followers that, "I'm a yelp gangster." He's also occasionally tweeted out links to his own Yelp reviews since 2013, and Yelp itself acknowledged the former Silicon Valley star's contributions last month.
Still, if any part of the cat was still in the bag, it's now officially out, and if you're a fan of the often eccentric comedian's body of work, you can probably consider the words and images of Yelp user "t.j. m." to be cannon—and an interesting comedic detour at that.
So what does a T.J. Miller Yelp review read like? Well, you need not look any further back than last week when Miller tossed in his two-cents on New York City eatery Niu Noodle House 15 Greenwich Ave, New York, NY 10014 in the form of a nearly 500-word mix of jokes, personal observations and, occasionally, helpful feedback. Things start off with a healthy dose of anti-humor—"We mostly go for the dumplings, but this place is no 'dump' in terms of its noodles that's for sure!"—but things eventually do take a more informative turn. "The Hong Kong pork bun, and the fried pork buns are incredibly delicious and very soft," he later continues, "if they are warm when they come to the table push them against your eyes and your face... You'll thank me later!, or it'll feel weird and you won't thank me when you see me later on."
That said, if Miller's occasionally controversial comedic musings aren't entirely your cup of tea, you're likely to find these 23 Yelp reviews and the accompanying photos a bit odd. A 2016 review of Chicago's Furious Spoon 1571 N Milwaukee Ave, Chicago, IL 60622 sums things up nicely. Miller wrote, "I thought this place is about as delicious as it gets. I only give it four stars in the hopes that one day somewhere there will be something more delicious than that, that it does get more delicious than this. But until that day I think this is about as delicious as it gets." To which the Furious Spoon's owner replied, "Thank you for your interesting review, t.j." Interesting indeed.