The dressing brand's online shop is full of holiday gifts for people who love to dip.

By Jelisa Castrodale
November 20, 2020
Advertisement

This is the time of year when people look at the names on their holiday gifting lists, and occasionally have to ask themselves "What do you give the person who already has everything?" If you haven't already, you might want to scroll through Hidden Valley Ranch's new holiday collection. In addition to embroidered blankets, the now-obligatory ugly sweaters, and one-piece bathing suits, Hidden Valley is also selling a customized Smeg refrigerator that comes with a lifetime supply of Hidden Valley Ranch dressing. 

The 24" fridge has been wrapped with an awe-inspiring illustration of an oversized bottle of ranch, and the recipient will also receive a shipment of 25 bottles of Hidden Valley. (The assortment includes Hidden Valley Ranch Secret Sauce Original Ranch, Hidden Valley Ranch Blasted, Hidden Valley Ranch Ready to Eat Dips Fiesta Ranch, Hidden Valley Ranch Ready to Eat Dips French Onion, Hidden Valley Ranch Seasoning Shakers, and Hidden Valley Ranch Original Ranch). 

Those ranch shipments will arrive once a year until 2024; after that, Hidden Valley will send a one-time payment of $600 that can be used to buy ranch for the rest of the recipient's natural life. A 24-ounce bottle of HVR's OG-Ranch currently runs about $4, which means that the additional payments are good for 125 additional bottles. (According to the small print on this offer, Hidden Valley estimates that you'll go through five bottles of ranch every year between now and your eventual demise).

Credit: Hidden Valley

The Lifetime of Hidden Valley Ranch and the "Ranchified Refrigerator" costs $900, which is kind of an alright deal when you do the math. You'll get $600 bucks back in 2025, and you'll also receive roughly $400 worth of ranch—and that doesn't even include the value of the fridge itself.

Unfortunately… there were only three of these offers to go around and, as of this writing, they appear to have already sold out. You could still send someone 900 bucks and earmark it for ranch dressing. That would be just as nice.