You Shouldn't Have: 6 of the Worst V-Day Gifts

Chocolates are usually a can't-lose on V-day, but if you try to get cute and chocolate-shame your boo with this découpage bathroom scale, may you spend an eternity in hell being poked by Russell Stover, Ferrero, Rocher, and the M&M who always looks high. The worst part: This scale is currently sold out, which means a lot of people actually thought this was funny. Art de Toilette Bittersweet Scale, $95, available at Uncommon Goods.

Other side effects of true love may include: Flushed cheeks, dry mouth, sweaty palms, nausea, and an inexplicable desire to sway to Dave Matthews Band's " Crash Into Me." Iron Accents Refuse To Settle Box Sign, $8, available at Iron Accents.

Your love for him or her is an everlasting fire. Celebrate it with a gift that says, "The post office was literally the only thing open." USPS Forever Hearts Framed Art, $29.95, available at USPS.

A candle for V-Day isn't exactly the most novel gift in the world, but don't over-correct by buying a unique, yet incredibly creepy, grimacing face one. Just buy a really expensive one, instead. Uncanny Art Shop Bodily Candle, $17.74, available at Etsy.

The figurine holding an "I [Heart] You" sign inside this terrarium is available in a variety of genders and skin tones, so now every person can envision themselves as tiny, lonesome love-peddlers to an unhearing world. Twig Terrariums Love Grows Here Terrarium, $85, available at Uncommon Goods.

This keychain comes in a gift box that says, "I'm nuts about you." Things wrong with this gift: A: Corny pun. B: Utterly emotionally stunted way of expressing sentiment. Oh, and C: It's a f'n keychain. Vilmain I'm Nuts About You Key Ring, $19, available at Amazon.