Jameson Irish Whiskey Will Make You a 'Desk Decoy' so You Can Take St. Patrick's Day Off

Jameson Decoy

Courtesy of Jameson

Sometimes it feels like part of having vacation days is stressing out about whether you should actually use those days or not. According to a 2022 survey by Zippia, over 61% of U.S. workers feel guilty about taking time off from work for reasons that range from worrying about falling behind on projects or feeling less valued by their coworkers. But the good people at Jameson Irish Whiskey want all of us to make the most of our hard-earned PTO days — starting with St. Patrick’s Day

To encourage us to skip out on our 9-to-5s for the day, the whiskey-maker has created the “Jameson Desk Decoy,” a life-sized cardboard cutout that you can set up at your workstation while you’re off doing…literally anything else. 

“We’ve all been there before — your boss forgot you took an SPTO [St. Patrick’s Day Time Off] and swings by to meet one-on-one. Or your finance department didn’t get your SPTO memo and requests your latest expense report while you’re out of the office,”  Johan Radojewski, Jameson’s vice president of marketing, said in a statement. “That’s why in the true spirit of Jameson, we are introducing the Jameson Desk Decoy: a comical, life-size version of yourself for the office, so the real you can take that planned SPTO and go celebrate St. Patrick’s Day.” 

If you’d like to get your own cardboard likeness, you can order them through the Jameson SPTO website. You’ll have to upload a photo of your face, select which Jameson-themed outfit you’d like Cardboard You to wear and decide whether it should stand 5’6” or 5’11” tall. It costs $17.80 (plus tax)  for each Jameson Desk Decoy, a price point chosen because Jameson was founded in 1780. 

You can place an order between now and Friday, March 10, to ensure delivery by St. Patrick’s Day. The company does note that quantities are limited, so you might want to take a selfie and place that order sooner rather than later. Jameson is also donating 100% of the proceeds from Desk Decoy sales to the Restaurant Workers’ Community Fund (RWCF) and will also make an additional $25,000 contribution to the organization. 

And because Jameson has thought of everything, they’ve put together an SPTO toolkit, complete with some seasonally appropriate backgrounds for your next Zoom meeting and three OOTO email replies you can use while you’re out enjoying the day elsewhere. 

If you’re unsure how to pull this off, actress Regina Hall appears in a series of videos to demonstrate how her Jameson Desk Decoy helps her bail on the office. “I can totally understand the feeling of wanting to take a day off yet not wanting to feel bad about it, but with St. Patrick’s Day falling on a Friday this year, it’s the perfect day to plan ahead and take one of those hard-earned PTO days,” she said. 

We’ve made peace with the idea of being out of office for St. Patrick’s Day, but, wow, we’re gonna feel terrible when we have to stash our Desk Decoy in the supply closet until next year. 

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