Mike Pomranz
Updated January 29, 2015

Stop what you’re doing! You have to head to eBay right now. You have a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to purchase the world’s largest BBQ pit!

Now this isn’t an auction. It has a “Buy It Now” price of a mere $350,000.

You might say, “Hey, that costs more than my house, and I can’t sleep in a BBQ pit!” To that I say, well, maybe you can sleep in a BBQ pit; don’t be so narrow-minded. And second, let’s look at all the features you are getting with Undisputable Cuz, as the pit is named:

1. It is longer than a tanker truck.

2. It can cook up to 4 tons of meat at one time. 

3. It has 24 doors and a walk-in cooler to store all that meat that’s waiting to be cooked.

4. It has beer taps and a “place for TV and stereo equipment.”

The 40-ton affront to God is ventilated by seven smokestacks featuring dampers with handles shaped like the state of Texas. It’s so big you need special permits and a police escort to drive it!

The real question is: Why would anyone be selling it? It seems that owners Terry and Kim Folsom are sick of it being stuck on their front lawn. Kim Folson told Houston’s KHOU, “I'd rather just sell it and get it gone.”

If interested, you will need a semi to tow the pit, which can be a challenge to rent from U-Haul.

[h/t Laughing Squid]

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