© Dog Shit / YouTube
Mike Pomranz
Updated February 22, 2017

Exploiting other people’s fame for your own benefit is nothing new. Hell, it’s the basis of the entire TMZ media empire. But few celebrity centric stunts have ever been this bizarre. And after six days of eating photos of Jason Segel, the guy behind it may just be getting started…

Six days ago, a YouTuber going by the name “Dog Shit” (nice!) posted a video entitled “I Eat a Picture of Jason Segel Everyday Until He Eats A Picture of Me. Day 1” [sic]. For all intents and purposes, the video delivers exactly what is promises: A cap-wearing young man takes a letter-size computer printout of actor Jason Segel’s face and proceeds to calmly tear off pieces and eat them until the entire sheet has been ingested. He does so without any commentary and with only the aid of a bottle of water. Upon completing his goal, he remarks, “Hey Jason,” and then the 4 minute, 20 second video abruptly ends.

Equal parts far-out performance art and far-out alternative comedy, the video is the work of Toronto resident Noah Maloney. The idea originated because he and his friends “just like to make stupid videos and this is what happened,” he told Munchies. “We thought it would only be for our friends’ enjoyment.” Instead, the video has gone viral, racking up over a half-million views, and whether he originally intended to or not, Maloney has pretty much been stuck forging ahead with his photo eating plan.

Day 2 was pretty much the same concept, though he worked faster, tearing through a color red carpet close up in under three minutes. Day 3 occurred while walking around outdoors, and at an even faster pace, this time wearing a homemade #EatMyFaceSegel T-shirt. On Day 4, the video begins with Maloney getting a Jason Segel tattoo before he tears through another printout, this time in well under two minutes… as if even he is losing patience with what he’s putting himself through. The last video that went up is Day 6 – featuring what appears to be a live stage performance – though personally my favorite so far is Day 5, which I won’t spoil for you.

So when does the madness stop? When Jason Segel eats a photo of Noah, of course. And to that end, Maloney has been spreading a link to the photo he’d like to see the How I Met Your Mother star chow down on. “I think it will happen,” Maloney was quoted as saying. “I will not stop until he eats a picture of me. If I die it’s on his hands . . . Hey, Jason.” Unfortunately, so far it appears Segel has yet to respond to the stunt. (Though as an important side note, the actor appears to have only used his official Twitter account three times since 2012, so any response would probably have to be a bit more formal.)

But a better question than when does it stop is what is his end goal? “I cannot stress enough that this is not fueled by anything,” Maloney stated. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but the guy who’s eating printed photos of Jason Segel for no reason actually doesn’t sound that crazy.

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