The ranch dressing titans just announced a clothing line, at long last

Maria Yagoda
November 07, 2017

What a time to be alive!

In a move no one saw coming, Hidden Valley Ranch has unveiled its first-ever clothing line, which will include merchandise you can wear to advertise your love of ranch dressing. The low-fashion pieces include a sweatshirt that says "Ranch," socks and slippers adorned with ranch dressing bottles, a ranch Christmas sweater and the absolute perfect Christmas gift: socks that say, "If you can read this bring me ranch." Many of these items would make delightful stocking stuffers for the person in your life who dips their pizza in ranch dressing. (Everyone knows at least one.)

Courtesy of Hidden Valley / Flavour Gallery

The items are now available for purchase on Flavour Gallery, in case you wanted to get a head start on holiday shopping. They even have ranch-decorated Christmas tree ornaments if you want to keep things a little more traditional. 

Courtesy of Hidden Valley / Flavour Gallery

If you're more serious about eating ranch than wearing ranch-inspired pieces, we'll point you in the direction of another one of their 2017 holiday offerings: a $50 ranch dressing keg, for all those moments one single squirt just won't do. Or, if you're looking to entertain for a slightly more upscale event, Hidden Valley Ranch is also selling a ranch fountain, for the price of $110. The fountain essentially pays for itself, coming with a year's supply (12, 36 oz. bottles) of ranch.

Courtesy of Hidden Valley / Flavour Gallery

Once you get decked out in all your new gear, you can road trip to the St. Louis restaurant called Twisted Ranch that includes ranch in every single item on its menu. Yes, this is real. 

Courtesy of Hidden Valley / Flavour Gallery

If you're not a ranch person (how!?!?), there's always Forever 21's Taco Bell line