Courtesy of Deeplocal

Blitzen—a “rooftop beverage chiller”—almost sounds too good to be true.

Mike Pomranz
December 19, 2017

Rarely do inventions come along that are equal parts awe-inspiring and painfully obvious. But the Blitzen “rooftop beverage chiller” would seem to fit into that category. The strange new concept from Pittsburgh-based innovation studio Deeplocal taps into a thought we’ve all had before: It’s cold outside; I could probably cool something just by holding it out the window while I drive. Of course, this idea is also inherently idiotic, if only because you’d clearly freeze your hand off as well. But with Blitzen, Deeplocal claims it has made the concept work by creating a holder that can allow you to strap a bottle to the roof of your car and safely cool the drink while you drive.

According to the company, the product was “born out of necessity.” “The liquor store only had warm Prosecco when a Deeplocal engineer went to pick up a bottle,” the brand’s website states. “With a short drive home and no time for conventional refrigerator chilling, he engineered a solution to make the cold weather work for him.”

Courtesy of Deeplocal

Too good to be true? Well, April 1 was a long time ago, and Deeplocal insists otherwise. “Blitzen is very real. 100-pound magnets, aluminum rails, all that,” the company states. “Cooling time depends on ambient temperature, car speed, and a whole lot of other factors that some of our engineers here spent way too much time calculating… Speaking of engineers, please don't go randomly strapping bottles to your roof. All of our tests were conducted under controlled conditions with extensive safety measures.”

Outside of that, however, few details exist. The company offers up a few photos and animated gifs for this “roof hootch” holder that supposedly can carry and cool anything from champagne bottles to growlers. But as far as pricing and availability is concerned, all the Deeplocal site says is “Enter your email and be the first to know when Blitzen is available.” So the bad news: Christmas 2017 is ruined. But the good news: You already have your list started for Christmas 2018… hopefully.