© Edd Westmacott. / Alamy
June 22, 2017

We’ve learned a lot from Game of Thrones over the years: how to kill a king on the sly, how to navigate the emotional complexities of an incestuous relationship, how to brainwash and torture a man until there’s nothing left of him except a hollow shell called Reek. But last night we learned something less disturbing: how to make a perfect kidney pie.

While searching for Sansa Stark, Brienne of Tarth and her faithful squire, Pod, stopped by the Inn at the Crossroads, where Brienne made the mistake of complimenting Hot Pie, that loveable, pudgy, baked goods enthusiast who was sold to an innkeeper by the Brotherhood Without Banners in Season 3. He pulled up a seat and dropped some serious kidney pie knowledge on them.

According to Mr. Pie, a great kidney pie is “all about the ingredients,” which are flour, lard, water, eggs, milk, bottom round steak and calves’ kidneys. But the most important component is the gravy. Don’t get him started on the gravy. “A lot of people give up on the gravy,” he said. “But you cannot give up on the gravy. No gravy, no pie.”

Wiser words were never said, Hot Pie. Someone needs to get to work on the T-shirt. Watch the full clip here

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