The incredible tension in HBO’s True Detective has probably already driven you to drink or, if you’re like Detective Rust Cohle, to slam down a handful of quaaludes. But if you’re the type who prefers to drink with structure, here are some guidelines for the probably insane final episode.
1. Take a shot whenever you see one of those weirdo dream catchers. Oh god, what do they mean? They’re like something that Damien (a.k.a. Satan, Jr.) would make at summer camp!
2. Have a long, slow, contemplative sip of your drink every time someone mentions the Yellow King. Because what if you’re the Yellow King? What if everyone is?