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Talk about "classic."

July 14, 2017

You know how when you leave a Coke in the fridge for a couple days and then take a sip, it's kind of stale and gross? Well, try leaving it in there for six decades. For the video series Don't Put That in Your Mouth, filmmaker and show host Mark Cersosimo and writer Anton De Ionno just tried a bottle of Coke that's been sitting around since 1956. Okay, so it's not totally the same thing. At least the Coke bottle was never opened. But still, which would you rather drink?

So yeah, this bottle of Coca-Cola has been around since Eisenhower was president, gas cost 22 cents, and Elvis Presley, Johnny Cash, Jerry Lee Lewis, and Carl Perkins were singing in a quartet together. It's the kind of Coca-Cola that Archie, Betty, and Veronica might drink after the the sock hop. It's so old that the cork inside the cap has turned green.

Still, when they poured it, there was a little bit of carbonation left. After trying it, they describe the flavor as "musty," "It's like you dipped a grandma in this," and "Have you ever licked an old couch?" Mark goes on to say that it pretty much just tastes like a Coke that's been left out for a little bit, with which Anton strongly disagrees. As Anton puts it, "You very happily drank a whole cup of what you're now describing as, like, groin juice?"

Along the same lines, Mark gives it a 6.5 out of 10, while Anton gives it a three. But you've got to bear in mind that Mark, after 28 episodes of Don't Put That in Your Mouth, probably has a pretty skewed perception of what food is supposed to taste like. After all, this is the guy who's eaten meat he picked out of the trash, sour cream & onion crickets, mayonnaise made for dogs, and so much more.