Napkins: Pro or Con

Comedien Hannibal Buress Is In the Non Napkin Group.
Extreme Napkins. It’s not technically a napkin, but this is clearly where the napkin-obsessed crowd is going. I’m now infatuated with something called the Adult Bib, which I found on the website stupid.com (another obsession). Here’s the description, which I really can’t improve on: “It’s hard to dine on messier foods when you're a Sophisticated Adult. Instead of starving yourself while the others get to eat ribs, seafood, caviar and escargot, you can quickly strap on your Elegant Adult Bib. These glossy, high-class Bibs are made from easily washable yet abnormally expensive-looking black vinyl with velcro straps.”
Non Napkins. At Aziz Ansari’s very hilarious Hot Chocolate stand-up show in Brooklyn this weekend, the opening act Hannibal Buress (a Saturday Night Live writer who’s also hilarious) went off on a surprise rant. “I never put a napkin in my lap,” he said. “Because I believe in myself. I believe that I’m an adult who won’t spill food on himself.”
Me, I’m leaning toward the Non Napkin group.
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